The Ballet of Absurdist Nonsense

Ballet. Ballot. They’re counting fake ballots.

What –

Fake it till you make it. It’s the art of the deal.

But –

Fake it till you make it, yeah! Fake it till you –

But what –

Yeah! That’s the way, uhuh, uhuh, I like it, uhuh, uhuh, yeah, that’s the way –

But what if you die?

Fake news! You! You! You’re fake news. The MSM. The facts are on my side. I got the facts. The alternative facts.

If you die tomorrow?

The TV’s my instrument. Voice radio’s my people. Twitter – it’s my instrument. I play it like a guitar, a great, big, beautiful – and I’m the greatest player, yeah! It’s fun!

You can fool all of the people –

Yeah! That’s the way. It’s fun to stay. Fooling the losers.

Some of the time. And you can fool some of the people –

Seventy million people can’t be wrong. I’m telling you, seventy million. And that’s just the ones they counted.

Some of the time. But you can’t –

Don’t you tell me what I can’t do. I can do anything. Anything I want. I can walk down Broadway and shoot someone. They’d still love me. I didn’t say that! You’re fake news. Loser!

Fool all of the people all of the time.

Yeah! Fools and losers. That’s my opinion. I’m entitled to my opinion. Snowflake.

But what if you die in a ditch?

Unfair! Unjust! Stop the count! The illegal ballet. Mail-in. Stop counting the illegal ballot. I won. If you count the legal ballots. I won. By a lot. These are the alternative facts.

But what if they string you up?

And what about China? The China virus. They made it. The Democrats, the Demoncrats, the Lizardmen, the Chinese. I call them the Chinese. They released it deliberately. To spoil my success. Couldn’t take my success.

String you up by your feet from a lamppost?

I’ve done more for this country than anyone. Ever. Period. I’ve built more walls, I’ve built more towers, I’ve built more factories, I’ve built more jobs, I’ve sent more tweets, I’ve won more votes.

Hanging like Mussolini.

A very fine person.

By your feet with your arms swinging, reaching for the ground.

Shut up! Shut the fuck up! You’re fired! You loser! Libtard! Snowflake! That’s my opinion. Fake it till you make it. It’s the art of the deal.

You can’t always get what you want.

Note

I’m taking part in the month-long FlashNano 2020, a flash fiction exercise run to coincide with NaNoWriMo. Nancy Stohlman publishes a daily prompt and the challenge is to write a short story of 1000 words or less inspired by the prompt. The prompt for the 17th November was to view Ferdinand Léger’s Le Ballet Mechanique. (Hence the attempt at a French subtitle.) A bit different from her usual prompts so far, but an interesting challenge. I was put in mind of the absurdist nonsense coming out of the mouth of a certain politician, much in the news today. I tried to be the little voice of uncertainty in his head. Assuming he has such a thing.

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